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A day will come when the story inside you will want to breathe on its own. That's when you'll start writing. - Sarah Noffke

In the span of a single breath, my entire existence was upended, the familiar rhythm of the past 24 years abruptly altered. It all hinged on those five unforgettable words: "I'm sorry, ma'am, he's gone." In that fleeting moment, the weight of the word I dreaded most settled upon me - widow.

This blog serves as a testament to my journey of self-discovery amidst the chaos of this new reality. It's messy, it's genuine, it's unfiltered. This life, it's God's narrative, and I'm humbled to be entrusted with sharing it - a tale of His boundless love, His relentless redemption, transforming even the darkest chapters of our existence into a purpose that magnifies His glory.

Here, I'm committed to baring it all - the messy, the raw, the authentic - in the hope that it may offer solace and healing to others walking similar paths.

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…and on we go

When your greatest fear becomes reality, what do you do?

I think, you have two choices. Allow this reality to define or refine you.

Finding My Way Back to the Shore

We all have hopes and dreams, but what are we supposed to do when our hearts are broken and our dreams can’t come true?

That’s the question I found myself staring at recently within a Bible study I am doing with a friend, and gosh if it didn’t hit me right in the gut. Reflecting back on this now over a year of live I’ve been living…

I just want my brain back…

When your greatest fear becomes reality, what do you do?

I think, you have two choices. Allow this reality to define or refine you.

It’s so raw watching yourself become a whole new person…

When your greatest fear becomes reality, what do you do?

I think, you have two choices. Allow this reality to define or refine you.

Brick Walls

When your greatest fear becomes reality, what do you do?

I think, you have two choices. Allow this reality to define or refine you.

I’m Back for Another Round

I walked back into the ring for a few rounds, and had no idea.  I got sucker punched, over and…

Widow: Stigma or Strength?

When Joe died, one of the first things I thought was, I was his wife, and now I’m his widow.Widow. …

The Wine Jesus Drank: Why would he refuse the first, and drink the second?

The enemy studies us.
He knows our playlist.
He knows what we say to ourself.
He knows our proclivities.
He knows our struggles.
He knows our insecurities.

The enemy will use anything he can to get to our relationship with God. He will attack what’s most valuable.

The enemy knows more about our destiny than we do. ‘The enemy isn’t after where you’re at right now, he’s after what you could get access to in the future and the influence you have. This is why he wreaks havoc over anything that matters to us – emotions, minds, willpower, families and futures.’ Juliana Page

What are we supposed to do when our hearts are broken and our dreams can’t come true

We all have hopes and dreams, but what are we supposed to do when our hearts are broken and our dreams can’t come true?

That’s the question I found myself staring at recently within a Bible study I am doing with a friend, and gosh if it didn’t hit me right in the gut. Reflecting back on this now over a year of live I’ve been living…

The moment I decided, I would be ok

When your greatest fear becomes reality, what do you do?

I think, you have two choices. Allow this reality to define or refine you.

dear laura

a letter to myself, a year later…

Sea of Galilee | Why do we have limiting beliefs when we have a limitless God?

Why do we have limiting beliefs when we have a limitless God? Our God is a God of the impossible!

Change of Season

Change of Season There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens. – Ecclesiastes…

Battle Cry: 11 Months

The enemy studies us.
He knows our playlist.
He knows what we say to ourself.
He knows our proclivities.
He knows our struggles.
He knows our insecurities.

The enemy will use anything he can to get to our relationship with God. He will attack what’s most valuable.

The enemy knows more about our destiny than we do. ‘The enemy isn’t after where you’re at right now, he’s after what you could get access to in the future and the influence you have. This is why he wreaks havoc over anything that matters to us – emotions, minds, willpower, families and futures.’ Juliana Page

Distracted & Scattered: Creating Space for Jesus

Distracted & Scattered: Creating Space for Jesus Distracted and Scattered.   That’s how I have felt lately.  Very distracted and a…

A New Lens

The most clear lens I’ve put on is Jesus. This lens also comes in and out of focus as well, but as I allow God control in my life, it all becomes so much clearer. When I find one of those old lenses trying to come back, I switch to the lens of Jesus. Switching to the lens of Jesus is quite incredible. With this lens on, it doesn’t matter what other lens I may be looking through, adding His lens brings everything back into focus.

Surrender

He walked away, about a stone’s throw, and knelt down and prayed, “Father, if you are willing, please take this…

Hold Me Jesus …here we are, 9 months later…

Hold me Jesus.

Over the last several months I realized that there are many times when I just needed someone to give me a hug, or to wrap their arms around me in an embrace. I found myself often longing for someone to hold me when the grief was so heavy. I just wanted someone there to wrap their arms around me with that physical assurance that everything was going to be ok.

When the person you expect that from is gone, you must find it from somewhere else. This is when the loneliness really set in for me. The little things you’re so accustomed to leaning on someone else for, and then they’re gone and obviously no longer able to provide.

The Breaking

I shared this as a post recently, and wanted to capture it on the blog.  But this graphic spoke to…

Eight Months

Flipping the Switch Eight months.  244 days.  We are closing in on our first year with Joe’s loss.   Writing…

7 Months

7 Months The Tide is Shifting 7 Months My thoughts on month seven… For seven months, I keep finding little…

Happy New Year

Happy New Year … thoughts on 2023 Moving forward. That seems to be our theme for the last six months. …

Six Months

Six Months. 183 Days. I could also count the minutes and seconds, but let’s just say it’s A LOT.  But…

The Empty Stocking

Nothing can prepare you for all the firsts after a loss.  The first birthday. The first anniversary.  The first Christmas. …

breath

Yesterday I attended the funeral of a woman I had never met in person.  Valerie was introduced to me by…

Four Months

Weeping may last for the night, but a shout of joy comes in the morning. Psalm 30:5 Four Months |…

100

100. 100 days. Triple digits. This is still all so surreal.     After Joe passed, we had visitors from…

The Sun Always Rises

Three months.  Today marks month three of living without you here on Earth.    It is insane to me that…

God’s Got My Back

Strength isn’t pretending to be something you’re not.  Strength is having the courage to live from the truth of who…

Spiritual Obedience

Spiritual Obedience This morning, I slept in.    For those that know me, I am usually up between 4-5 am. …

The Club

The Club…that no one wants to be in Yea, I said it.   There’s this club of people who understand…

The Grief Brain

Can we talk for a minute about this thing called ‘Grief Brain’? It feels so silly to even talk about…

The Next Right Steps

J – It’s insane to me that you passed just two weeks ago.  The moments seem to be flying by…

75 Life Lessons for My Daughters

‘Hang in there momma, just a few more steps before you can let the tears flow…’ That’s what I kept…